Friday, August 24, 2012

Cora Update

In case you have been wondering how baby Cora is doing, here's a little photo update.

Thursday, August 23, 2012

Today's Her Birthday

Happy Birthday to Ava-

My, how you have grown over four years.

To watch just wait for the Smilebox to load and press the plus sign. You can control the speed, etc.
But I have learned to edit. Readers, you should be proud of me.

We love you, Ava.

Click to play this Smilebox slideshow

Wednesday, August 22, 2012


I feel like I’ve found a new use for my pool
I get in it daily to help keep me cool.
That alone made having it worthwhile to me.
But now I have a new use you’ll just have to see.

Sure playing and pool basketball and pool volleyball rock.
But swimming in place now that’s fun, like a space walk.
I’ve always liked swimming, exercising and such.
More mental than physical, a new Midas touch.

Some say it looks nerdy with the equipment and all.
Some say it’s just old farty; what gall!
I say it’s young farty for a 63 old man.
Improving my stamina and I might get a tan.

So if you are looking for a workout that is easy on your joints.
Don’t laugh, take me serious and you’ll sure get my point.
Come over and try it if you like to swim.
I think you will enjoy it, and it might also keep you trim.

In closing you may have noticed I now talk in rhyme.
Kind of strange for an old/young fart coming in to his prime.
My mentor, an old doctor, used this technique.
His name, Dr. Seuss, and he wasn’t a geek.


Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Smacks of Old Fart Wednesday-I Can't Make This Stuff Up

Summer has put a damper on the posts coming in for the blog this week.

Pat emailed me that he had "writer's block",  and I could totally empathize with him. You see all the posts I have put up this week.

I decided to call for reinforcements. I sent an email to my kids and their spouses asking them what they think of when someone says "Old Fart".  I was proud that none of them just took the easy way out and said, "You and Dad."

Jacob wrote back, "Not being able to use the self-checkout line at the grocery store."
I had to chuckle to myself, because I have seen Barry struggle with this.

Joanie  said, "Super loud TV".
Well, I know that we have the sound up louder on our TV than they ever do.

Michelle said "Falling asleep watching TV/while visiting people, and looking for glasses."
Hmmm... Do I know anyone that does that?

Then, Miles replied, "Carrying around and using Kleenex."
Just then Barry walked by with a box of Kleenex and sat down.

Oh, it could have not been better if it had been planned.

Saturday, August 11, 2012

My Future?

Becky F. sent me this video of a skit of Sychronized Swimming. Enjoy.

Click here:

What No Glitter?

Friday, August 10, 2012

Senility and Swimming

I do use Barry as fodder on this blog. But, I have to admit, I may be getting a little senile.

First, this week was NOT the last episode of The Closer. Maybe I would like to attribute my confusion with too much Olympic watching, but my children would probably roll their eyes. Then they would make remarks about putting me in a home soon. I am not even going to tell them that I drove halfway home from Nordstrom yesterday with my blinker on.

One of my other "old" things is that I like the Synchronized Swimming at the Olympics. I told Barry people did not appreciate how hard that is to do (not that I have ever done it-but Michelle did it camp one summer). 
Barry replied, "No they don't, and they never will." 

Well, synchronized swimming teams. I appreciate you. I especially hold in high regard any sport that lets one wear lots of make-up, allows a cute up-do in the water , and has sparkly costumes.
Since I don't like water going up my nose, the nose-clips are a plus for me also. 

Barry on the other hand was totally entertained by the BMX last night. 

I will admit, it was a little more exciting than Synchronized swimming. But, a monkey can ride a bicycle. Poor unappreciated Synchronized swimmers.

Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Smacks of Old Fart Wednesday-When are They Going to Learn?

There is a saying that you can't teach an old dog new tricks. I am not sure that Old Farts learn lessons either.

Sunday morning we awoke to a mildly bad odor in the house. Barry thought the dogs needed a bath. He was correct about that, but I knew that was not what I was smelling. I looked under the kitchen sink and saw that the garbage disposal was leaking. Luckily, we caught it early. So, Barry went to Lowe’s for a new one and went to work. I was very impressed with how quickly and neatly he did this. 

Monday morning, I started the dishwasher. Then I left for a short period. When I came back the floor was covered in water. I decided not to bother Barry about it while he was at work. 

Then, we received this email from our friend Jerry B. You may remember that on one RV trip Barry and Jerry took out the television on our RV, drove all over Arkansas looking for another one, and we eveidently ended up with the JerryTron. Then last summer we went on an RV trip to Colorado with Jerry and Kathy. There were a few mishaps there also. 

So, unbeknownst to what was going on at our house, this is the email Jerry sent us.


Here are the top ten titles for this story, all are suitable.

1. Why do these things happen to me.
2. Why didn't I call the plumber
3. My Wife is going to kill me
4. When am I going to learn
5. This can't be happening 
6. This was supposed to take 30 minutes
7. What am I going to do now
8. WTF
9. When am I going to listen to my wife

Now for a few of Kathy's titles to the story. 

1.When is this man going to learn
2. What is wrong with this man
3. I told him so
4. Why is he so stupid
5. One of these days he's going to listen to me 
6. 9 hours and only 1 trip to Home Depot
7. We didn't need a new faucet
8. Oy!

8:00AM Sunday Morning
The day started innocently enough. I figured I would replace the powder room faucet ( a perfectly good faucet that still looked like new)  with a more modern one I had left over from one of my construction jobs. I said this should take 30 minutes. I can do my other chores for the weekend and maybe swim later.  All I have to do is turn off the supply valves , unhook the faucet, put the new one on, and turn the water back on. I turned off the valves, unhooked the water line from them, and noticed a little dripping. I figured that would be ok when I hooked the faucet back up and turned it back on. Then the ordeal started. The faucet wouldn't come off the pedestal sink. I tried for an hour to unhook the faucet  and then decided that my neck couldn't handle any more laying on my back. It was time to pull the pedestal sink from the wall. 

I cut the caulking with the utility knife and the sink was ready to pull away. I pulled and the molly bolts made 2 huge holes in the Sheetrock. I think this was the first of many WTF"s I uttered.  Wel,l the sink was off so I replaced the supply valves. I turned off the water to the house,  unhooked the valves, and there was still water coming out of them. I figured I would be done quickly with the replacement and there was no need to worry. I put a bucket under them. Well, I tried for another hour to get the compression rings off the pipe,  but no luck. Time to call the plumber. I figured I'll would try to get the faucet off the sink until he came. 

Plumber never called back . I was not going to wait for him. The water was off in the house  (but still dripping on the wall and floor) . I looked on the Internet, and someone had a good idea on how to remove the old compression fitting. I did it and finally new valves were on, water was on, and everyone could pee again. Now, what to do? I had to do something now because I had completely ruined the old faucet trying to get it off, and it was still on the damn sink. Do I go get a new sink or what? 

1:30 PM
Still trying to get the *#*%#*^ faucet off the sink. I decide I could do some drilling and get it off. I pinched  my finger really good with pliers and have a big blood blister, but at 2:15pm the *#*%#*^ faucet is finally of the *#*%#*^ sink. 

2:15 PM 
Time for the first  and only trip to Home Depot. I get back about 3:00PM and hook up the new faucet and lines. I am getting ready to install it on the newly fixed wall when all of a sudden I hear, " Aren’t you going to put the new matching drain in the bottom of the sink?" I put the new *#*%#*^ matching drain in the sink.  About  45 minutes later, I was finally ready to put the *#*%#*^ sink with the new *#*%#*^ faucet, and new *#*%#*^ drain on the wall. 

4:30 PM 
It's on the wall.  I caulked the sink, and Kathy looks at it. That is when I heard it. "It's a little crooked" . 

The sink is still crooked and will always be crooked.
this may be an exaggeration

 Everything is cleaned up and mopped, but there is no time to jump in the  pool. It's raining!

Now all that needs to be done is float the Sheetrock above the sink, paint, and put matching towel rings and toilet paper holder. But I don't think it is going to happen. I'M AFRAID AND FEAR FOR MY LIFE.

I thought after 38 years of marriage that I knew all of my wife's  "Looks". I couldn’t quite decide if the "Look" she gave me when she came in the bathroom and saw the sink off the wall, the holes in the wall, and the water and caulking everywhere was one of disgust, hate, or fear. You would think I would know after all these years.

Now back to Barry and the disposal. When Barry got home and found out about the leak, who did he call for advice? You guessed it-Jerry. (and even though he told Jerry not to tell anyone he called him for advice, Barry is married to the editor of this blog and that is risk he takes). Jerry said it sounded like the air gap. Barry worked on that, and I ran the rinse cycle. Thinking Barry would watch his handy-work, I went out back to grill. I came in and saw Magic sitting in front of the open cabinets under the sink with his head cocked and water running out below. 

Barry then pulled out his household repair book and realized he had not removed the drain plug.  

Maybe they are not Old Farts, just bad plumbers. 

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

A Little Tech Tuesday and then Media Monday

First, I had several question about what I had prepared for my horrible dinner. It was fish. Fish is not my favorite meal, but I do like it much more than in the past. I just don't like to cook it and don't do it well. I never really like my own fish.

Thanks for the wasps tips. We cannot find a nest, but we have sprayed the attic and will see if that works.

Now to the semi- present:

Tech Tuesday and Media Monday Mash-up

I didn’t get Media Monday  posted Monday morning because my Internet was down. I called AT&T, and they advised me to go online and check out the support page. When you have already told them you have connectivity issues, does that seem like the best advice? 


 I have said before I tend to take blurry iPhone photos, because I move the phone.  Did you know that you can put your finger on the shutter release and hold it there until you are set up. Then...release. So much easier. I also might have to change the name of my Tech Tip Tuesday to Tech Tip Tuesday for Old Farts. I don’t believe I have any new tips for the younger generations and probably only a few for some Old Farts. 


The Olympics- Right now this is taking our biggest television viewing time. 
I’ve run into so many people that don’t watch the Olympics. Isn’t that un-American? 
They need to see Missy Franklin just to brighten their day. 


Isn't she an amazing seventeen year old? I am not talking just about her swimming either. She is so at ease in the interviews, and I love that she is enjoying every moment. The fun has been sucked out of the women’s gymnastic team. I have enjoyed watching them, they are just too robotic. (maybe over media tutored?)

 Remember when they used to show a segment about athletes from around the world on the Olympic shows? What was it called?  Are we too global for that now? They have done some of this, but not enough for me.

The Rangers- 
What can I say? They are making me very nervous. When we aren't watching the Olympics we are watching them. I am wondering how Oswalt has the right to say when he wants to pitch and when he doesn’t. Does he have an amazing contract, or are the Rangers in need of some “tough love” right now. Come on Rangers, you have got to finish it out this year! 

Shark Wranglers- 
The History Channel is doing a much better job filming and editing this show than their previous channel.
The History Channel is giving all the crew members camera face time. I like that because I get to see Alex Snow more. He is probably freaked out that he has an old lady stalker. I do have some questions for Alex about the Ocearch. Maybe his mom will make him answer them, if I send the questions to him.

About Face: Supermodels Then and Now- This documentary is showing on HBO right now. The faces that graced the magazines when I was growing up are interviewed. Yes, models used to model for magazine covers back in the day, not actresses. These women are all still beautiful and many of them still model. However, several of them found that they felt more beautiful when they were loved by someone they loved, and entered what I would call “the real world.” They have their own opinions about plastic surgery and aging. There are no deep delving issues discussed, but it is entertaining to see them again. 

The Closer: 
Monday night was the last episode. It is on the DVR. If I don't watch it will it end? 

Philosophize that...

Saturday, August 4, 2012

If You Don't Want to Read the Whole Post, At Least Read the Last Paragraph

I just finished eating one of the worst meals I have cooked in a long time. For some reason, I felt compelled to open with that statement, which is bad writing as the meal has nothing to do with this blog. I just needed to confess.
Ben stayed with us for a few days this week. We have spent some fun-filled days, playing golf, swimming, scoring his cannonballs off the board, and playing with walkie-talkies. When the temperature rose to 109, we went to see Madagascar 3 and played some games on the iPad. 
(I must interject here as I have seen a lot of commercials for The Lorax lately.  I did not enjoy that movie at all- boring and preachy. But, I did enjoy Madagascar 3.) 

Ben and Barry were so inspired by their bowling techniques on the iPad, we decided to go bowling for real. Barry and I do not bowl, so if I had not called ahead, we probably would have gone to Alley Cats. It is newer, caters to kids and families, and has a really good name. However, I did call and found out that Alley Cats is very expensive. So, we headed to Spare Time Lanes. I had not been there since late high school/early college. Let’s just say it had been a few years. 
Besides the fact that the bowling balls were in terrible condition at Spare Time Lanes, the place has spruced up since I was there last. Spruced up = cleaner and better lights. The price was right, too. 

We probably recorded the lowest bowling scores of this century. The surprising thing is that both Barry and Ben must have bowled amazingly well on the iPad. They seemed so disappointed with each roll at the lanes. I finally had to bring them back to reality by telling them that “We aren’t bowlers, and we can’t bowl! So just have fun.” (I was actually more supportive to Ben in his efforts and a lot more realistic to Barry.) It’s an ugly job, but someone has to be the voice of reason. 
Now for the very important question- We have wasps getting into our bathroom. Where would you assume they are coming in? Luckily it has just been one or two at a time. Would they be coming through the plumbing, through the air vents, or possibly the light fixtures? Send your thoughts soon!