Smacks of Old Fart

I'm a 65 year old retired senior citizen.  I believe you're only as old as you feel, age is just a number, and a 60 year old Baby Boomer is equivalent to a 45 year old member of that great generation that  fought and won World War II.  Retirement is more fun than I ever imagined, and aging most definitely beats the alternative.

HOWEVER, I have one fear that haunts me to the core of my soul.  Every night, when I go to bed, I ask myself....."Did I do or say anything today that Smacks of Old Fart?"  It can sneak up on you so fast that you don't even know it.  You've got to constantly be on your guard.  Things that use to be cool (like saying, "Hey, that's cool") really aren't "cool" anymore.  However, I doubt that wearing your belt buckle above your belly button or black socks with shorts and sandals were ever the height of fashion.  But, jeans bought long enough to roll the pant legs into cuffs were once considered "cool."  Now, it just Smacks of Old Fart.

Jan has asked me to keep my eye out for things that "Smack of Old Fart" and report them back to her for inclusion in her blog.  This I will do on a bi-weekly basis (if that really means every two weeks), and may even include a picture or two.  That is if I can figure out how to take a digital picture, download it to my computer, and attach it to something that I can send to her.  You see I'm really just a Big Chief Tablet and #2 Pencil kinda guy.  And, that in and of itself, probably Smacks of Old Fart.

Pat

AUTHOR'S NOTE:  I have just been informed by my daughter that wearing socks, even black socks, with sandals and shorts are are now considered fashionable. Can you believe it? That one snuck up on me in a hurry. See what I mean. You've really got to keep your guard up.  

One Week Old and Oh So Cute

Little Tiny Cora

Are You One of the 3.9 Million?

Or were all the 3.9 million teenage boys?

Daenerys Targaryen (Khaleesi)- my favorite
character. She has dragons!
source

3.9 million people watched the Season 2 premiere of Game of Thrones. I was one of them. While it has been a few weeks since the debut of Season 2, I still wanted to write a little something about this series. I can't write much, because the series can be grim to watch, and this is a family blog. 

It is an epic fantasy based on the novels of George R. R. Martin novels. I have to admit, I have not read the novels.  It might have helped me follow the first season, but then, again maybe not. It is a convoluted story, that adds characters all the time. Seven noble families fight for control over the mythical land of Westeros. There are three principal story lines. I find the story captivating and have really enjoyed the series. But, be aware, this imaginable story is filled with deceit, brutality, incest, sex, nudity, and mythical creatures. It is hard to believe some (or a lot) of the scenes are actually on television. But as they say, "It's HBO." 

The photos are of just a few of the many characters in this series.

Arya Stark-just one of the females that
is planning revenge. She has a list, guys!
source

Tyrion Lannister- devious, but is the nicest of the
Lannisters (which is not saying much)
source

Saturday Night Live had a funny skit about Game of Thrones.  The skit has been removed from YouTube and NBC for music liability, but as of this post, it was still on the linked site, if you wish to watch it.

SNL Skit

What are you watching?

Seriously?

Did you really think I wasn't going to post anything about Cora Kaye Schneider? The photos are below, if you don't want to read the post!

Michelle was admitted to the hospital on Saturday evening, April 14th to begin the process of giving birth to this beautiful little girl. She and Miles were troopers through this undertaking, as Cora was not born until Monday, April 16th at 5:26pm. As the nursing shifts changed, Michelle was afraid she was going to run out of kind nurses before Cora was delivered.

The Schneiders and Briers, of course, were all up to the hospital and back home several times during that time.

I must give a shout out to Brett. He was there and took care of anything that needed to be taken care of.

He got Miles out of the hospital for lunch a couple of times, he drove people around, he took the kids to play, and cooked Sunday evening dinner for them so I could relax .  (Shannon and Joanie were at the hospital giving moral support to Michelle.)

I also must give kudos  to Dr. Wiley, Michelle's obstetrician. When she put Michelle on bed rest, Cora was barely 2 pounds. With her guidance, Michelle was able to grow Cora to 5 1/2 pounds by delivery.  She was patient and confident that she could deliver this baby without a c-section.  Plus, when she came in to see Michelle on Tuesday, she sat and held the baby for long time. We love her.

Click here to see the photos:

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SMACKS OF OLD FART WEDNESDAY

SMACKS OF OLD FART

This is the introductory guest column called “Smacks of Old Fart”. You’re probably wondering where this title came from. Well, here is the skinny on that. While on a recent vacation with our friends Pat and Jennifer Oler, it became apparent that we were all getting old. Things just kept happening that just really smacked of something old farts would do. So, the four of us thought “you know there are a lot of old farts out there that would love to read a blog about this subject” (actually it was Pat’s idea). That is if they could find their glasses...oh yeah..they are on top of their heads. Like most old farts we procrastinated. Pat and I (Barry) decided (actually this was Jan’s idea) rather than figure out how to write and post a blog of our own, we could write a guest column and post it on Jan’s  blog, Inside the BrierPatch. Not to be confused with Inside the NFL. Pat and I decided we would make Wednesday our day to post. We plan to alternate. Therefore, without further ado, the following is Volume 1, No. 1, April 18th, 2012. (Oh s__t, April 18th, did I forget to file my taxes?)

I really do not try to do stupid things. Technology doesn’t help in this regard. Tonight while calling my SOOF co-writer, Pat Oler, is a case in point. You know when I was young, I had at least all my friends, relatives, work and other telephone numbers memorized. Not sure if I could still do that but thank goodness I don’t have to. I looked up Pat and Jennifer’s number on, what else, my cell phone. Personal file cabinet and keeper of all important and necessary information to function. Then I called them on my land line. I can actually hear the conversation on a land line. Anyway, Jennifer answered, and we were catching up when I heard her phone beep and what sounded like a recording come through. The number being announced on her caller i.d. was familiar. You guessed it, yes it was me pocket calling the Olers from my cell. Doesn’t that just Smack of Old Fart? 

If you have any SOOF stories please forward them to me. You might get credit. Maybe not. 

The photo is a re-enactment of me pulling off this SOOF snafu.

Yours truly,

Barry

ps: Jan said that this information I just gave her was a SOOF article itself. I think it is more of a ps.

 I was reading one of my veterinary news feeds, “Animal Health Smart Brief”, when I segued to an article on how bats fly so efficiently. Then I jumped to an article called “The Most Ridiculous and Comprehensive Way to Test Toilet Paper” by the Consumer Reports People. Well it turns out that White Cloud TP sold at Wal-Mart is better and cheaper than Charmin.  I think Pat would have commented, “well I rectum it is”. He is more homespun than me. Tune in next week to see what I mean.

Holy Memorandum! The Secret to Bats’ Super-Efficient Flight Could Help Make Better Military Drones

Tomorrow is the Day

We are excited! Tomorrow,  Michelle and Miles will welcome their baby. Michelle has been a "model patient".  That is what her doctor told her. Her doctor is correct. Michelle followed her doctor's orders and was a trooper.  If you know Michelle, she does not like to be still. Our neighbor used to call her "perpetual motion". So, I know that it was difficult for her. ( I know now how difficult it is for anyone put on bed rest.)  Michelle and Miles were fortunate to have a lot of help. I am going to attach her blog, so she can tell you all about that.


Michelle's Blog

A List That Didn't Even Reach Ten

1. The baby bluebirds are growing. I may not have even mentioned that we had baby bluebirds. Mom and Dad Bluebird have been busy feeding them. They were gracious enough to let us take a photo or two. We thanked them by leaving out some meal worms.

2. Ben is playing soccer. Isn't he cute?

3. We are all awaiting the birth of Michelle and Mile's baby. She should be here next week. Michelle is anxiously awaiting the baby and the ability to get up and move around. I fear that after a couple of weeks, she may wish she could lay down again.

4. While Michelle and Miles are waiting their baby, Miles' brother and his wife, Sarina, had their baby boy, Campbell. Congratulations! Here he is with his paternal grandmother, Bennie Rue.

4. The azaleas are so pretty this year. Now I just have to get up the nerve to cut these plants back after they finish blooming. Ever since I cut my Madame Alexander doll's hair (when I was five), I fear that when I cut something it might not grow back. Maybe that is why getting a haircut has always been traumatic for me.

5. I went on a ladies golf trip. My auto focus button was not on auto focus. I did not figure that out until I got home. Oops. I, too, have not been very focused of late.

 Golf is such a relaxing game that the course provided a noose on a tree in the rough. Some people had to go into the rough to search for balls. Becky decided it might be easier to hang herself than hit out of that rough. Dee was worried about the snakes. I tried to tell them to just stay out of the rough, but no one listens to me, not even my ball.

6. Brett took Ben and Scarlett with him on a business trip to Houston. Ava and Lucy loved having them there. Lots of cousin fun ensued, I heard.

7. In the time I started writing this list and now, the baby bluebirds have flown. They actually did it while we were at a Ranger game. Just left, quickly and quietly. Birds are flighty friends.

8. The trappers have trapped several coyotes in our area. It makes me sad that the coyotes did not take my advice and move to Joe Poole Lake or better yet, that people didn't leave dog and cat food on their back porch to tempt them. We have to work together people!

9. I fear that the tornado has kept our guest blogger, JoeOnTheTube, from sending in some posts. He is an insurance agent. I know he is taking good care of his clients right now. What will he write about next? Mad Men, Game of Thrones, why Glee has gone downhill (writers, I suspect), or anything else you might suggest. So send in those suggestions.

Rock N Roll Half Marathon Runner

Last weekend, Joanie came in for a dual purpose. One was to check on her little sister. Here she is sharing some darling videos of Ava and Lucy with Michelle (who is still on bedrest.)

Two, she was running a half marathon with her friend, Tiffany in Dallas.

During her run, Barry and I had a little time to cheer everyone on.

Then, I took him to Love Field to fly to Houston for the day. As the text of Joanie's time came in, I knew I was going to be cutting it close to get to our meeting place before she finished. She was flying.

I made it with about twelve minutes to spare. I had time to take a photo of this young women pushing her children. I don't think she pushed them through the race, but kudos to her for even running when she has these three at home. Dedicated or crazy? You decide.

 The finish was at Fair Park. An interesting area of Dallas to run through, I must say. 

Here is Joanie at the finish. They piled the food on her at the finish, but I wanted to get her photo as soon after she finished as possible. 

Here is a little side note about my daughter, the runner (with two small children). Her father used to have to bribe her to exercise with him. Now she is out everyday either running before everyone gets up or pushing the girls in the jogging stroller. Mucho Kudos to you, Joanie! We are proud of you.